David Bowie has just released the video for his song "The Next Day" from the album of the same name. Just in case you were wondering, he is still awesome.

The song is vintage Bowie, and wouldn't be out of place on The Man who Sold the World, Let's Dance, or a Charles Manson album.

As for the video, it's loaded with creepy, sadomasochistic religious imagery. David Bowie plays himself (Jesus), and Marion Cotillard and Gary Oldman also pop up.

Coincidentally, Bowie an Oldman have both played Pontius Pilate in separate films. That's not very interesting, but we're writing the blogs here, not you.

Related >> Music: TORO Reviews David Bowie's The Next Day


The verdict is in: David Chang has a problem with Houston's space food.

The Momofuku chef recently visited NASA's Space Food Systems Laboratory with Chef Traci Des Jardins and netiher liked what they tasted.

The Kona Coffee with Cream, consumed with straw and pouch, got two thumbs up. Everything else didn't go down very well.

After eating his Crawfish Etoufee, Chang said he felt like he was "in space or prison."

Des Jardins landed the Tofu with Hot Mustard sauce and wanted to "spit it out."

Commander Hadfield: We feel your pain and can't wait to deliver you a steak upon reentry.

Related >> Daily TORO: David Chang On MSG's Goodness
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This past weekend, the Xenophobic Cowboy Fellowship National Rifle Association held its 142nd annual convention in Houston, Texas. Rick "Niggerhead" Perry, Sarah "Moose" Palin, Rick "Frothy Fecal" Santorum — all of your favourite colonialists were there!

Naturally, America's national jester, Jon Stewart, took aim. Although, when you're shooting goons as self-aggrandizing as members of the NRA, it's hard to miss.

Our favourite quotation from the event, delivered by peace-lover Glenn Beck: "The only difference between your mom and your sister getting raped, and them walking home unmolested, is a gun."

Thank you, Glenn, we feel so much better now.

You can watch the circus below.

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The Associated Press reports that Grammy-winning musician Lauryn Hill has been sentenced to three months in jail for failing to pay taxes of around $1 million over ten years.

"I am a child of former slaves who had a system imposed on them," Hill said in court. "I had an economic system imposed on me."

Last year, Hill pleaded guilty to failing to pay taxes of roughly $1.8 million earned between 2005 and 2007. Despite paying back more than $900,000 in the past few days, the U.S. attorney's office argued she still owed money in penalties and interest.

Hill claims that her avoiding taxes coincided with her exit from the music industry, each action an attempt to protect the "safety, health, and freedom" of her children.

The 37-year-old New Jersey native came to fame in the early 90s as a member of the Fugees, before enjoying a successful solo career.

Related >> In Pictures: Lauryn Hill Performs with Nas


The Star is reporting that 23-year-old Oshawa native Kyle Hay was knocked out by a Bruins fan after Toronto beat Boston 4-2 on Saturday night. You can watch the aftermath below.

The alleged assaulter has not been seen since the game.

Hay was taken to a local hospital and ended up with a swollen cheek, a cut inside his mouth, three staples in the back of his head, and a concussion.

"[I'm] still a little sore in the back of my head," Hay told the Star.

What's more: all of this happened on Hay's birthday. His friends are trying to get him a ticket to tonight's game in Toronto, but perhaps the sweetest revenge would be a Leafs win instead.

Related >> Daily TORO: Watch a Human Statue Punch an Idiot
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NOW is reporting that Chef Franciso Alejandri's temple to Mexican cuisine, Agave y Agucate, is reopening at 35 Baldwin, sometime in June.

The restaurant will seat 50 people and serve brunch, lunch (eventually), and dinner. There will be patios at the front and back.

The new Agave Y Aguacate will be a partnership between Alejandri and furniture designer Keyvan Foroughi, who will run the front of house.

Alejandri closed his original stall in Kensington nine months ago, never hinting when he would return. His food has always been a Toronto favourite, and received even wider acclaim after appearing on Anthony Bourdain's The Layover.

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This Sunday, everyone's favourite glutton Anthony Bourdain travels to Quebec on his new CNN show, Parts Unknown.

According to the show's site, Bourdain "travels to remote areas within the province of Quebec where he samples local delicacies, explores ice fishing and beaver hunting."

Accompanying him are Joe Beef's Dave McMillan and Fred Morin, two of Montreal's most famous chefs.

Also along for the ride is Au pied de cochon's Martin Picard, the chef famous for creating squirrel sushi and putting foie gras on pretty much everything.

Bourdain also visits Le Continental, talks Quebec sovreignty, and travels on Via Rail.

"[It was a] Franco-Canadian full-on assault of the liver," Bourdain told CNN.

Sounds delicious to us.

Parts Unkown airs Sundays at 9 p.m. on CNN.

Related >> Talking To: Anthony Bourdain
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Just because Daily TORO likes to keep things classy, we bring you Reese Witherspoon's drunken arrest video! (Via harball journalists TMZ, of course.)

As you likely know, Witherspoon and husband Jim Toth were arrested two weeks ago in Atlanta, both drunk. Toth was allegedly driving just a little funny when he was pulled over by local police. In an attempt to stop her husband's arrest, and demonstrate how much of an asshole she could be, Witherspoon argued with the cop, resisted, and was eventual arrested herself.

The video confirms that Witherspoon [1] thinks that she is an American citizen, and [2] needs to switch to coffee.

We hope this video makes you think twice about drinking and driving and ever watching one of Witherspoon's movies ever again.

Related >> Reese Witherspoon Got Really Drunk and Arrested


Baltimore's electronic wunderkid Dan Deacon has just released a wacky new video for his song "Konono Ripoff No. 1." You can watch it below.

The video is a another Deacon-trademark acid trip into the Mushroom Kingdom, inhabited by people who are probably the musician's friends.

The song's manic vibrations are an extension of his current album, America, a collection TORO described as a seething "computer virus."

"Konono Ripoff No. 1" is meant to be played with the Dan Deacon app, which you can get off iTunes. We'd tell you what it does, but we don't care.

Related >> Talking To: Dan Deacon
Related >> Music: TORO Reviews Dan Deacon's America


Washington Wizards centre Jason Collins has just come out as the first active, openly gay professional athlete in American professional sports.

He shares his story in the new issue of Sports Illustrated, claiming it is time to start the conversation about homosexuality in male sports.

"If I had my way, someone else would have already done this," he writes. "Nobody has, which is why I'm raising my hand."

Collins says the lack of distraction during the 2011 NBA lockout forced him to come to terms with his identity.

"And...when I acknowledged my sexuality I [feel] whole for the first time," he goes on.

The sports community has already shown support for Collins via Twitter.

Lakers shooting guard Kobe Bryant:
Proud of @jasoncollins34. Don't suffocate who u r because of the ignorance of others #courage #support #mambaarmystandup #BYOU

New York Knicks point guard Baron Davis:
I am so proud of my bro @jasoncollins34 for being real. #FTheHaters

Congratulations to Jason Collins for finding himself in an often difficult and prejudiced world. Sports is better off because of him.


For our money, the most exciting political-related event is not the election, nor is it Dick Cheney's rewiring at the auto repair shop. It is in fact the White House Correspondents' Dinner, because we get to see the President perform a half-hour of stand-up. You can watch the hilarity below.

Both President Obama and guest comedian Conan O'Brien killed it Saturday night. Highlights included Obama's admission that he wasn't "the strapping young Muslim socialist" he used to be, and O'Brien's ripping into NRA executive vice president and crypto fascist, Wayne LaPierre.

So it's settled then: Obama is the coolest black president since Bill Clinton, and O'Brien still 6,000-times better than Jay Leno.

Related >> TORO Man: Barack Obama, America's Jesus
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The Toronto Star is reporting that Maple Leaf Sports and Entertainment has hired Tim Leiweke as its new CEO.

The former head of the Stanley Cup Champions Los Angeles Kings and MLS champions Los Angeles Galaxy, Leiweke is decribed by MLSE as being one of the "top sports executives in the world."

The Star is also speculating that Leiweke's influence may lure legendary NBA coach Phil Jackson to the Raptors, in a front office role.

Leiweke will take on the job in June.

"I'm very excited because it's about a platform that's even larger than what we started with at [former employer AEG]," Leiweke told the Los Angeles Times.

The executive says that turning each of MLSE's sporting franchises (the Leafs, Raptors, Toronto FC, and the Marlies) into perennial contenders is his top priority.

One wonders how Leiweke's hiring will effect the Raptors' general manager Bryan Colangelo and coach Dwane Casey, underperformers in these last few seasons. Will he be forgiving?

Related >> Egos and Icons: MLSE - The Dawn of a Sports Behemoth
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[html]Country music legend George Jones has died at the age of 81. A longtime genre favourite, Jones’ career was marked by his numerous chart-topping hits, spanning five decades, his alcoholic lifestyle and six-year marriage to fellow country star Tammy Wynette. Their numerous duets and collaborations continued long after their divorce.

Jones’ best known songs include the J.P. Richardson / Big Bopper-penned “White Lightning,” “She Still Thinks I Care” and “He Stopped Loving Her Today.” His greatest influence may have been his distinctive vocal delivery, a twangy baritone imitated by countless artists, from Merle Haggard to Garth Brooks. While those averse to country music may not have heard his hits, his many imitators crossed over to the pop / rock charts countless times.

Jones was in the process of preparing his final concert performance before retirement, which was set for November of this year. The list of guest performers included Kenny Rogers, Brenda Lee, Garth Brooks, Charlie Daniels, Crystal Gayle, Randy Travis, Don McLean, The Oak Ridge Boys, Kid Rock and dozens more.


It's just been announced that Mad Men actor Jon Hamm will host this year's ESPY awards, ESPN's salute to the already wealthy and celebrated athletes of the world.

"The combination of Jon’s dry wit with his passion for sports will give fans a unique and original view of the year in sports," executive producer Maura Mandt said in a statement.

Born in St. Louis, Hamm is a big fan of the Cardinals and the Blues. He's also the most good looking, charming dude on the planet, so we think he'll manage.

The ESPYs will be held on July 17 at the Nokia Theater in Los Angeles.

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We at Daily TORO are big fans of Jimmy Kimmel — Oscars 2014, anyone? — for his complete irreverance and ball-breaking bite. One of our favourite Kimmel segments is Lie Witness News, in which interviewees demonstrate how they will say anything on camera to sound informed.

Kimmel recently took the bit to the Coachella Music and Arts Festival, where he asked hipsters about bands "so obscure that they do not exist."

You can watch the spectacle below.

Mark Twain once said: "If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything."

And Daily TORO once said: "If you're under the age of 30, don't act like a douchebag."

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In honour of last Saturday's Record Store Day, New York psych-pop band MGMT released a limited cassingle of their new song "Alien Days."

Now, the song is available online, via SoundClound. You can listen to it below.

"Alien Days" is the first single off the band's forthcoming third album, which will likely be released in June. The song takes the listener down a vibrating landscape of sound, chanelling Sgt. Pepper's both childish and frightening tone.

MGMT begin their spring tour April 26 at Penn State. All of the dates are listed below, with stops in Winnipeg, Saskatoon, Calgary, Edmonton, and Vancouver planned.

Related >> Music: TORO Reviews MGMT's Congratulations

MGMT 2013 Tour Dates
04/26 – University Park, PA - Penn State University
04/28 – Geneseo, NY - SUNY Geneseo
04/30 – Portland, ME - State Theatre
05/01 – Providence, RI - Lupo’s
05/04 – Cleveland, OH - Masconic Auditorium
05/06 – Grand Rapids, MI - Hoogenboom Center at Calvin College
05/08 – Winnipeg, MB - Burton Cummings Theatre
05/09 – Saskatoon, SK - Odeon Events Centre
05/10 – Calgary, AB - MacEwan Hall
05/11 – Edmonton, AB - Starlite Room
05/13 – Vancouver, BC - Commodore Ballroom
05/14 – Spokane, WA - Knitting Factory
05/15 – Seattle, WA - Sodo
05/16 – Portland, OR - Crystal Ballroom
05/18 – Stanford, CA - Frost Ampitheater
06/21-23 – Dover, DE - Firefly Music Festival
06/29 – Kansas City, KS - Kanrocksas
07/13 – Cincinnati, OH - Bunbury Music Festival


Disney and Marvel have just released the first trailer for Alan Taylor's Thor: The Dark World. You can watch it below.

In this film, Thor (Chris Hemsworth) must take on a mysterious enemy that predates the universe, and then save everybody from dying. The plot sounds suspiciously like every other superhero ever made, but who cares? Natalie Portman is back!

The film also stars Tom Hiddleston, Anthony Hopkins, Idris Elba, and a bunch of other British people.

Following the forthcoming release of Iron Man 3 (May 3), Thor: The Dark World will be Marvel's second installment of what they're calling Phase 2, the post-Avengers series of superhero films that will see the studio become more wealthy than the continent of Africa.

Thor: The Dark World premieres October 30 in the U.K. and November 8 in North America.

Related >> Daily TORO: Watch a Marvel Movies Phase 2 Preview
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After his hair, the battle he had with Jay Leno, and that time he dry-humped Tyra Banks, Conan O'Brien is probably best known as a former writer of The Simpsons.

After 20 years of professional divorce, O'Brien reunites with writers Al Jean, Mike Reiss, Jay Hogan, and Jeff Martin on his new web series, Serious Jibber-Jabber. You can watch the video below.

It's an intensely thorough, hilarious, and sentimental discussion among friends. With O'Brien (somewhat) moderating the event, the writers talk about comedic craft, their favourite Simpsons moments, and showbiz history. We also learn that Conan's imcomparable energy made him a favourite among staff, and eventually, a favourite among late night audiences.

If you have the time, the reunion is not to be missed.

Related >> Daily TORO: Conan O'Brien Gives an Awesome Speech
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A few years ago, Canadian comedian Will Sasso got really famous when he impersonated Arnold Schwarzenegger on MadTV.

Sasso has been revisiting bit via his Vine account, posting 14 videos of Arnold driving around, getting road rage, and checking out the ladies.

Now, for your viewing pleasure, you can watch a compilation of all 14 posts below.

Canada even makes a brief cameo in the video. Also, "Arnold" talks to a tree.


Related >> Film: TORO Reviews Arnold's The Last Stand
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According to Gawker, rookie news anchor A.J. Clemente has been fired for saying "fucking shit" during the first second of his first day on air. You can watch the tragedy unfold below.

The North Dakota anchor was practicing his teasers and didn't realize that his microphone was on. His more sentient colleague, Van Tieu, could do nothing but go on with the show.

"Unfortunately KFYRTV has decided to let me go," Clemente said via Twitter. "Thank you to them and everyone in ND for the opportunity and everyone for the support."

"Cant help but laugh at myself and stay positive," he went on.

Our sympathy goes out to you A.J., and we assure you that no children or prudish conservatives were harmed by your gaffe.

Remember, if Don Imus can get rehired, so can you.

Related >> Saskatoon Anchor Performs "Blow Job" On Air